Forgiveness

We are commanded by our Lord Jesus Christ to forgive those who sin against us (Col 3:13; Mat 6:12, 14-15; Mat 18:35). In addition, Jesus says that we will be forgiven as we forgive (see preceding verses). This is a frightening fact. I have struggled with this because emotions seem to play such an important role in how well we forgive. Emotions are very difficult to control. In a book I am reading,* Ed Wheat gives some helpful thoughts on this issue. He says there are three steps in forgiving someone:

1) First, there must be an act of the will. A person must actively choose to forgive.
2) Second, behavior must conform to God's plan or will for us. We must love our neighbor as ourselves, pray for those who persecute us and keep no record of wrongs. (Eph 4:31-32)
3)Third, God transforms our feelings and thoughts toward forgiveness and love.

So, we have two responsibilities which are dependent on our wills and God transforms the emotions. Notice the offender has no role in our forgiveness of him or her.


*Love Life For Every Married Couple by Ed Wheat and Gloria Okes Perkins, Zondervan, 1980.